What is toxic shame? Shame is often confused with guilt. Sometimes we use the terms interchangeably, but they mean different things. Guilt is the bad feeling you have when you’ve done something wrong. And if you’ve actually done something wrong, like run into your neighbor’s car, then you should feel bad. Guilt, in this situation, […]
Most of us lead busy stressful lives. We’re overloaded with information. We struggle to make decisions. We can’t focus. We rush and multitask because there never seems to be enough hours in the day to do it all. We always feel behind. We do things last minute because we forget or aren’t organized. We […]
Perfectionism seems straightforward, but it’s often misunderstood. Many people think perfectionism helps them achieve their goals and get better results. American culture continues to encourage perfectionism despite all of the research that indicates perfectionism is associated with increased anxiety, depression, suicidal behavior, eating disorders, relationship and health problems.* The fallacy that perfectionism is helpful […]
Are you quick to blame yourself – even for things you didn’t do or couldn’t control? When things go wrong, is your immediate response “it’s all my fault” or “I shouldn’t have done that”? For many of us, self-blame and criticism are insidious. We’re unrelenting with our demands and expectations and we’re our own […]
Pressure to be perfect So many of us feel intense pressures to achieve more, do more, and be more. We live in a technology-driven society that never stops. We’re constantly bombarded with the “my life is perfect” messages found on social media. It’s no wonder that so many of us are self-critical perfectionists who […]
Are you self-critical? It’s easy to fall into a pattern of self-criticism. Often, we don’t even realize that we’re speaking to ourselves with harsh criticisms that we’d never use towards others. Self-criticism becomes hardwired into your brain Self-criticism is like a bad habit – the more we do it, the more it gets […]