We Repeat What We Don’t Repair

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We Repeat What We Don't Repair

Do you seem to repeat the same dysfunctional relationship patterns – even though they leave you frustrated and hurt? Why do some people end up in one codependent relationship after another? Why does a woman with an emotionally distant mother repeat the same pattern with her own children? Why do so many adult children of […]

What Is An Avoidant Attachment Style?

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What is an avoidant attachment?

In this article, you’ll learn the signs of an avoidant attachment style, how it effects adult relationships, how to develop a more secure attachment style. Approximately 25% of us have an Avoidant Attachment Style. In my earlier post, What’s My Attachment Style and Why Does it Matter?, I explained the three primary attachment styles (secure, […]

Toxic Shame and How to Overcome It

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Healing from Toxic Shame

Toxic shame is a pervasive belief that you’re bad, wrong, unworthy, or inadequate. In this post, you’ll learn to change this belief and start feeling good about yourself. What is toxic shame? Shame is often confused with guilt. Sometimes we use the terms interchangeably, but they mean different things. Guilt is the bad feeling you […]

The Difference between Having Needs and Being Needy

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The Difference between Having Needs and Being Needy

Everyone has needs — for love, attention, affirmation, touch, and so forth. And some of our needs are met in relationships with others. There’s a big difference between having needs and being needy. Read more to understand the difference between having needs and being needy.  Overcoming codependency and poor boundaries requires us to notice and […]

Codependents’ Guide to Detaching with Love

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Detaching with Love

Detaching with love helps codependents and enablers. When we detach with love, we stop worrying and interfering and let others takes responsibility for themselves. What is detaching with love? Detaching (or detaching with love) is a core component of codependency recovery. If you’re often worried about a loved one, disappointed or upset by their choices, […]

7 Reasons It’s Hard to End Codependent Relationships

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7 Reasons it's Hard to End Codependent Relationships

  Why is it so hard to end codependent relationships? Codependency is a hard pattern to break. Even when you’re aware of it, it’s not uncommon to repeat the same type of codependent relationships, behaviors, and thoughts.  This is in part because codependency is learned in childhood – so it’s well-practiced and feels natural. But […]