codependency

Two sets of hands pulling on a rope. Text reads "Effects of Family Estrangement".

Many families experience estrangement. Sometimes an estrangement lasts a lifetime and other times family members reconcile and either put aside their differences or forge a stronger relationship. An estrangement can be a complete cutoff of all communication (no contact) or a partial cutoff where one person makes a consistent effort to limit contact or emotional …

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Affirmations for the New Year

The start of a new year is a natural time to look forward—to think about what matters most to us, clarify what we want to focus on, and set goals or intentions for the year ahead. But let’s face it, it’s easy to get pulled off course—to fall back into old patterns of behavior and …

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Reasons for parent-child estrangement

It can be hard to understand why adult children cut ties with a parent. This is usually because we assume that parent-child relationships are not only important but functional. Family is forever. Blood is thicker than water. These sayings reflect our assumptions that family relationships are close and long-lasting. Parent-child relationships, in particular, are expected …

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5 Reasons your boundaries aren't working

Are you struggling to set boundaries? Do you feel like you’re giving it your all, but your boundaries still aren’t working? In this article, I’ll review 5 common boundary-setting mistakes and offer some suggestions for setting better boundaries. First, a quick overview of what boundaries are and why we all need them. Boundaries are essential …

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self-talk for codependency recovery

How to Change Codependent Thinking. In this article, you’ll learn about “codependent thinking” and how self-defeating beliefs can impede your recovery from codependency. You’ll learn how to recognize codependent thinking and replace it with positive self-talk. What is codependent thinking? Codependency refers to an unhealthy relationship dynamic where one person is focused on taking care …

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How to Rebuild Self-Esteem after Narcissistic Abuse

What is self-esteem or self-worth? Self-esteem is how you feel about yourself. It’s similar to the concept of self-worth (and I will use the terms interchangeably in this article). Our goal is to have high self-esteem, meaning we feel good about ourselves most of the time. We know we have intrinsic value. And we know …

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codependency 101 photo of black woman studying

If you struggle with codependency, wonder if you’re codependent, or just have questions about codependency, this post will give you an overview of codependency: What is codependency? What causes codependency? How to start recovering from codependency. What is codependency? Codependency is a focus on other people’s problems, feelings, needs, and wants while minimizing or ignoring your …

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Black woman in white bathrobe. Text says "Self-Care and Codependency"

Self-care is the act of doing something that increases your health and wellbeing. Self-care restores your energy and “fills you up” emotionally, physically, and spiritually. It’s treating yourself with love and compassion. Self-care helps prevent burnout and is an essential part of living a healthy, happy life. But some people have a hard time doing …

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woman thinking. text reads "codependency and boundaries"

What’s the connection between codependency and boundaries? Below you’ll find a short video that I made discussing the link between codependency and boundaries, some bullet points to reinforce the main ideas, and some additional resources to aid in your understanding and support you in learning to set boundaries. Boundaries For this discussion, it’s important to …

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boy with head in arms. text reads: "shouldn't I be over my painful childhood by now?"

“Why is my childhood still affecting me? Shouldn’t I be over it by now?” Amy, aged 37, asked me at her first therapy session. “I feel like I’m complaining,” she said ashamedly. “I’m sure other people have bigger problems — real problems. I feel silly coming to therapy to talk about getting over painful childhood …

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